I recently spoke to a guy friend of mine who was telling me about a girl he met. He explained that they met a few times and although they lived in different states they kept in touch and I guess you could say they were trying to date from a distance. She went to visit him once and had plans to do so again before the year is up...Here is how our conversation went...
romo: So this chic I met a few months ago on the east coast is really feeling me She is a real sweet girl. However, long distance most often times lead to wondering eyes. And it's not my thing. What do you think? Good? Bad?
Pepperred: Sigh (here we go)
Romo: In addition to that she has too many love handles to envision a long term situation. lol She is planning on coming back to visit before the yr ends.
Pepperred: Lol So ur basically callin this chick fat? And that's an additional reason for u to not talk to her since she alreadys lives far. Correct?
romo: lol
pepperred: Correct.Well I'm sure u knew all of this from the beginning correct?
romo: she is
me: She is fat?Lol
romo: She is not fat but over weight.
pepperred: Lol Soooo my question is why were u even dealing with her in the first place if she wasn't appealing to u?
romo: Like if we were to engage in a situation I would need her to drop 25 pounds.........Pretty face though.
pepperred: Wow.Lol
romo: Nice upper body Thick lower body but mid sec needs work
pepperred: Lol 80/20 (if you don't know what that means please watch Why Did I get Married)...Welp all I can say is that u were silly for even takin it there with her if she wasn't appealing to ... Annnnnnnd she lives across the country. U were playin with her. Which is fucked up.
romo: lol.I told her I was not looking for a girl
pepperred: But she should have been smart enough to recognize that that shit wasn't gonna work.... Even more reason for her ass not to be fuckin with u.
romo: She knew
pepperred: Girls are silly
romo: I was't looking a for wifey... at least not in her
pepperred: I would have maybe hit u up if I was ever in town.Otherwise what's the point?
romo: lol
pepperred: Well ppl have their lists of likes and dislikes but often times (esp as u get older) u gotta learn to look over some shit. Hey she might like mofo's with Masters degrees Or that are 6'6... Orrrrrr that are dark skinned...I dunno. Welp u need to keep it real with her now and tell her that ur too superficial to talk to her. Lol
romo: Thats ok, she can have that 6'5 mofo.Some things you can change. Not that Im not perfect by a long shot.But I can say I try and actively hit the gym.I can deal with a work in progress, but not a castastrophy with no solution lol I have hinted at us being good friends.And she is 3 yrs older than me
pepperred: (I don't know what that had to do with anything)Lol smh.Well I can be the same way. I have alllll of these wants drawn out in my head
romo: I feel you.Why settle for less?
pepperred: I don't want a light skinned man, a man with bad teeth, a man that doesn't speak well, a man that isnt taller than me with heels on, a man that isn't chivalrous in all the ways I want him to be...etc etc etc.Buuuuut then u realize how dumb some of that shit is
romo: Not all of those things
pepperred: But if a man is good in all the other areas some things u need to learn to look over.I prefer a man that is taller than me buuuuut if the right man came around and treated me well I wouldn't trip Things like that ( this is what I tell myself anyway)
romo: I hear that
pepperred: U might want a girl whose hair curls up when its wet...Buuuuut...Lol
romo: lol, u know A splash of native american
pepperred: If u met a girl with nappy ass hair u shouldnt diss her cuz u can't run ur fingers thru that shit when its wet!
romo: lol Real talk.
*****I'll stop the conversation here.*****
Right now I must admit that I've dismissed A LOT of potentially good men because of superficial reasons. Yet I've gotten to the point in my life where I'm trying weigh which of my desires are totally unecessary and which are absolute deal breakers. You might want a man that makes six figures... but he might want a woman with boobs that sit up. Do they? He might want a woman with legs that never end and she might want a man with a hairline that isn't receding. Do you see a hair transplant in your future? He might want a woman with no stretch marks, yet she might want a man with balls that don't sweat excessively. Shall I pass the babypowder?
Everyone has flaws. Its up to you to choose which ones are feasible and which are (realistically) deal breakers. I guess at the end of the day though...to each his own. I'll tell ya one thing...don't demand that she be your Kardashian if you can't be her Bush! Right now I can't be your Kimora and you SURE AS HELL can't be my Russell!
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1 comments:
oh pepper! i like this topic. you know why because me alah 2001 was fly with the flat tummy and the perky boobs. now in 2008 .. I am a work in progress to get back there but I know on the inside any man would consider me a dime. I think the problem with your friend here is that he is more concerned with what others think than what he wants. It seems as though he really likes this girl but when it comes down to it he wouldnt wanna claim her because of the reaction he may get from others. ITs shallow but I could see how I might possibly do it if I found a caring, loving .. but pearshaped man.. His pearshapeness may turn me off and I may be embarassed if he met my friends.
but you know what as i write that.. it sounds pretty eff'd up and I wouldnt want anyone to do that to me. So I think I will be more openminded.
thanks JP!
oh and being in an LDR sucks!
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